Where's my mugging spirit?
Haiz. Think sth's seriously wrong wif me. I just cant study at all. Shd have seen it coming eva since sec3. Aft all, tts when the warning signs 1st started 2 appear n the decline slowly but steadily creeping in. Now, i dun even noe how the hell did i get into vj. Perhaps i was not even meant 2 be in vj cos i barely made the cut off pt n saw some of my dear friends who r in the same situation as me getting kicked out. Miracle 4 me then? Nah, more like luck 2 me. N lots of it 2 be exact. I dun deserve the miracle by the look of things...4 now. I once believed tt it IS a miracle n so i WILL do my best 2 cherish it n not waste it cos i feel tt i have 2 dui4 de2 qi3 this miracle n my friends who cant get the miracle. Now, though, i just HATE myself 4 not fulfilling this...yet. I am taking this 4 granted. The worst thing is I JUST CANT HELP IT!!! My motivation 2 study is gone, so far peer influence is not effective enough, im not in the mood at all, too many distractions, mentally n physically tired n drained... omg i might as well drop out of sch.
I really wanna find my mugging spirit! Pls come back! :( I seriously think i peaked too early when im still young. I used 2 be the envy of my classmates. Lol bet my current friends cant believe this ;p. Sadly its true, my past academic results r actually quite impressive. The feeling of course felt gd at times n now im actually surprised by how gd i actually am last time! Lol how ironic. Think is becos i eventually realise tts not wat i want. 2 be the most pro in studies, nah. HAPPINESS is MOST IMPT in life!!! :D EXPERIENCES TOO r essential, be it gd or bad!!! Yah maybe this change of attitude caused my mugging spirit 2 desert me :(
Haiz, reality just sux. If only u can get happiness from mugging. I noe some ppl r like tt n they r called muggers n nerds. LOL. Hmm i think its the attitude bah. I envy those who can derive joy from studying. So pro. Haha.
Nvm, i shall continue wif my quest 2 find my mugging spirit. Its a bit late 4 my mid yrs but well i hope 2 get it back in time 4 promos. Yah tts the most impt thing. As i have learnt from sports, especially soccer, the ball is round! Anything can happen!!! Comebacks r ALWAYS POSSIBLE!!! SELF-BELIEF is the most impt!!! Sports is so inspiring! Haha ;p
Oh n i finally get 2 listen 2 this song 2day! Wohoo! Its called Gu1 Jun1 Zuo4 Zhan4 by hong junyang(JY). Yup its in his latest album. Its the ( I Not Stupid 2 ) main theme. Im not a juvenile delinquent but i just felt so pissed wif myself these few days tt i felt like im turning into one. Thus i can connect wif this song. NICE. Gonna be addicted 2 it 4 the next few days, especially wif mid yrs coming up. Ha wanted 2 post the lyrics but cant type chi characters :( Oh the title is very applicable as well. Fight the battle alone. Well said. Go listen 2 it guys!!! ;p
Devet10's heart was taken at 5:12 PM